They enrich our lives. They comfort us when were sad. They even occasionally rescue or protect us from danger.
So why, oh why, would we disgrace our noble animals with clothes??
I'm not talking about the little booties you put on their paws to protect them from snow and ice, or even the little sweaters when it's particularly cold and they need to take a piss out back. I'm talking about needless things. Glasses. Hats. Bow ties. Anything that has words on it written in rhinestone. And above all... costumes.
My friends, these are not little humans. Oh no. They are meant to be companions, not Barbie Funtime Dress-Up Dolls. Experts even say they are to be treated like they are a part of a pack, in which you are the leader. What leader makes you wear a cheerleading outfit? A cheerleader, that's who! If you want a doll you can get dozens of undignified ridiculous outfits for, fine, be my guest. Hell, I'd rather you even have a kid to do it to. They can at least talk back to you when they get to a certain age. But these poor things can't even verbalize what asses they feel like in that cute little red number you picked up the other day. It's degrading. Would you want your mother dressing you up in nutty outfits for her own entertainment? Maybe she did, but that's your bag. DO NOT take it out on your pet. It's not his fault. Every dog or cat or parakeet I've seen in those things, looks up at me with those big ol' eyes of his and thinks, "Why are they doing this to me? Do you enjoy this? Is this what you do to someone who licks your face when you come home or brings you your slippers and evening paper?"
Okay, maybe they don't say all that, but if they could they certainly would. So, all's I'm sayin' is, think about what you're doing to your pets self-esteem before you put those coconuts and hula skirt on him (and YES, I've seen it). He and his friends will thank you for it. And if you want, buy the grass skirt for yourself.
If you or someone you love enjoy this horrible annual holiday, I do apologize. But it is worthy of an i ❤ idiots award, nonetheless. You could get e-cards to commemorate this momentus event here. I also included some pictures which illustrate my point. Look how she hangs her head in shame... And he's completely clueless...
B.T.W.-- January 28th is National Kazoo Day. Don't even get me started...
